Are You Confusing Agreement and Alignment?

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For years, I assumed that if someone agreed with me—on values, goals, faith, or even creative work—we were naturally aligned. But after walking through a friendship that unraveled faster than I could process, I realized how wrong that assumption was.

We agreed on almost everything, yet we were headed in completely different directions. The fallout taught me a truth many of us miss: agreement is shared thinking, but alignment is shared direction.

And this difference shows up everywhere—
at work, where teams “agree” in meetings but can’t execute together;
at home, where families agree in theory but not in habits;
and in our culture, where political agreement often masks deep misalignment in values and behavior.

I always love hearing how you spent the holiday, whether you were surrounded by family, grabbing a quiet moment for yourself, or trying to recover from how unprecedented this year has been.

And just so you know: I actually read every single reply that comes back to this newsletter. This community means a lot to me, and your messages are one of my favorite parts of the week.

So don’t be shy. Just hit reply and give me the rundown.

What made you laugh? What surprised you? What moment are you still thinking about?

I’d love to hear from you.

As for my holiday, it went well. I was on turkey and ham duty while we hosted at our home. All went well, but this clip sums up the vibe I had in the kitchen. Winging it with a little trial and error. I learned. I conquered. And I got good reviews from the family members, who don’t pull punches when it comes to food critique.

This conversation from Oprah caught my attention because it sits right at the intersection of this week’s theme—agreement vs. alignment—and one of the biggest cultural shifts happening right now. In her recent episode on going “no contact,” Oprah and leading psychologists unpack why an estimated one-third of Americans are now estranged from a family member.

This week, let’s look for the places in our lives—at work, at home, and even within ourselves—where we’ve confused agreement with alignment. Because if this conversation has taught us anything, it’s that shared opinions aren’t the same as shared direction. Someone can agree with your goals, your values, or your dreams and still be walking an entirely different path.

If there’s one thing I want you to take away from today’s newsletter, it’s this: now is the time to take inventory. Inventory of your team. Your circle. Your partnerships. Your expectations. Your pace. Your energy. And yes—your boundaries.

Get honest about who is actually walking with you. Your next season depends on it.

Until next time,